Sunday, November 27, 2011

So I Talk To My NFL Diary (Week 12, 2011)

"We champs like Magic at the point, Jordan with the 2's, Bird with the 3's, Pip with the D."

8:33: I'm up super early...I have no idea why. Unfortunately, with work today, no running diary, no watching the Pats in real time (which means most likely hearing about what happened in the game before I can watch it in DVR land). Sooooooo, yeah, there's that. Pretty sure I'm gonna head back to bed here in a little bit, but while I have my eyes open, why not do some fake gambling? (although I didn't write it down, went GB (-4.5), Miami (+6...yeah I did), and Baltimore (-2) on Turkey Day...again, I conveniently didn't record those three games and won all of them, so choose to believe that...or not...I...I don't really care)

The Red, White, and Blue Express (-3.5) vs. Philly: Vince Young is clearly a wild card in all of this, something I probably should have seen coming when Philly beat the G-Men last week rather than simply writing them off. I think really that's my only problem with this game. We just have no idea what Philly team will show up today literally and figuratively. No Vick, no Nnamdi, probably no Maclin...they're going to have to get creative. Once again, Bill, please, run the freggin' ball. 121.9 yards a game on the ground in their seven wins, 85.7 in their three losses (although they did go just over 100 against the Bills and the Giants, but the Steelers game really helps my argument).

St. Louis (-2.5) vs. Arizona: The "Chris Myers Game" is the first on the board today. Don't gamble or watch this game...that's literally all I have to say about this.

Jets (-9) vs. Buffalo: Annnnnddddddd I'm officially off the Buffalo bandwagon. No Fred Jackson = no chance.

Cleveland (+7) vs. Cincinnati: Another game that would probably be foolish to place any money/interest, I'm almost glad I'm working today so I don't have to be subjected to this giant shit-fest of games...almost.

Houston (-6) vs. Jacksonville: So if Houston had any sense about them, they would run, and run...and run in this game. Andre Johnson pushed this line up to 6 from as low as 3, but again, Foster and Tate will determine the outcome of this game. Also, despite not having Mario Williams, this defense is still pretty nasty. Jacksonville scares me because they're one of those "grind it out against the really good teams, play like shit against the bad ones" kind of team.

Carolina (-2) vs. Indy: Even after last week's backdoor cover by Detroit over the Panthers, I refuse to pull against Cam Newton...also, because it feels great to say...YOU SUCK INDY!!!

Tampa (+3) vs. Tennessee: Wait, so all we have to do is run LeGarrette Blount and open up the passing game for JAASSSSHHHH Freeman, and we could win games? Wow, what a fascinating concept that they should have been doing ALL F***ING YEAR!!! Oh my God dude, this team has been the singular most frustrating freggin' team to watch. They have all the tools on offense, and yet they do nothing about it. Then, in perhaps the swan song to end Green Bay's undefeated run in the regular season, they put together by far their best performance. Blount had his monster run and went over 100 on the ground, Freeman went over's been right there the whole time!!! Ahhhhhh!!! Anyway, I'm hoping Tampa beats them down so the Titans can get Jake Locker in there with their season basically being done. You gotta love this guy. His first NFL action is on the road down 21 points, and he promptly throws two TDs against a stingy defense led by Dunta Robinson (Game-the F-Cocks!)...again, I think Hasselbeck is adequate, but there's a potential gold mine on the bench that needs to get the call at some point.

Atlanta (-9.5) vs. Minnesota: Boy, it's amazing how easy picks are when stud running backs are out. No Peterson for the Vikes? Forget it.

Oakland (-3) vs. Chicago: Hinne looked good against the Packers in the NFC Champ game last year, but again, you have to remember that the Pack give up yards in bunches, so not really a good barometer there. Carson Palmer has like two or three of his best receivers out, but I would just keep giving it to Michael Bush, who has been arguably the most valuable player in the league in the last two weeks.

Washington (+3.5) vs. Seattle: Jesus Shanahan, run Roy Helu. What is wrong with this guy? 'Skins have a sneaky good defense that I can see Tarvaris and Co. sleeping on. The key of course will be Marshawn Lynch, who went from being a god after "The Run" last year, to being completely irrelevant, to being one of the top 10 backs in this league right now...what a journey.

San Diego (-5.5) vs. Denver: Being a Gamecock, I found it to be very surprising how much I have thoroughly enjoyed Tim Tebow owning basically all of the non-Green Bay spotlight in the league. However, I see this game, and I'm thinking if San Diego has anything at all, they will destroy the Broncos today. The Chargers are playing like crap, and they are absolutely in the thick of things in the AFC that division sucks.

Kansas City (+11) vs. Pittsburgh: NBC for the first time all year got a potential dud game due to injuries. I must be crazy to pick the Chiefs after their annihilation last week, but again, they're in the AFC West, and thus, in the playoff hunt despite being shitty.

New Orleans (-7) vs. The G-Men: Everyone needs to pray that New Orleans never plays in the Super Bowl at the Superdome...the roof would literally explode due to fan excitement or rioting...or both. Anyway, rule of thumb: Don't go against the Saints when it's a night game in the dome...I know the whole night thing shouldn't play a factor being as they play indoors and what not...but it totally does (I would go ahead and chalk that up to tailgaiting...if you know anything about southern football, you know it's on for hours and hours before the game).

One final note (you had to see this coming): USC beat the shit out of Clemson...again. This is now three years in a row that we've taken out the idiots who continue to wear orange and purple like it's so bad ass (seriously, who wears orange and purple?). If I said it a thousand times before, I'll say it again: We are here, we're not going anywhere. Quite honestly, given the passion that exists for this program, it's amazing that we have only eclipsed the 10-win mark twice in our history, and while most of the winning history of our athletic department has come recently, I would like to commend all those Gamecocks who were Gamecocks before I was born and before I went there. The history of USC sports pre-2001 can be summed up in one word...torturous. It takes heart to be a Gamecock, because no one knows about us (yet), and no one gives the proper respect that should be shown for someone who went to USC like they do with Florida and Georgia and basically every other big-time program in the south and, furthermore, in the country. I'm not sure if USC had a person like me in mind (mild-tempered in regular life, completely psycho in my sports life...and yes, I live two separate lives like that) in terms of spreading the good word about the USC, but I'm not going to rest until everyone knows us...I will say it is a lot easier when your football team is nasty and your baseball team is the defending back-to-back national champions! Ahhhhh yeah.

Alright, hope everything's going alright for ya out there. I'm going back to bed. Go Gamecocks!!!...and...

YOU SUCK CLEMSON!!!!...and....


Oh peace out!


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