Sunday, December 18, 2011

So I Talk To My NFL Diary Week Pats vs.Tebow (15), 2011)

"That rack was not built by ninjas."

11:08: Question: Is anyone else playing this week? I'm not really sure anyone seems to think so. Hahaha, dude, I want to know about Redskins/Giants like a thousand times more than Pats/Broncos...this is getting kinda gross how much coverage this is getting. Anyway...but yeah, it does have the feel of the biggest thing ever. Haha, but it's ALL anyone's talking about! So I'm going to be ridiculously brief in the breakdown this week.

This game will be decided in my mind in the first half. Honestly, we just need to go super-charged on offense and go up 34-0 or 34-3...otherwise, if you let this team hang around and have any chance, they are GD frightening right now...and it was probably a good call to say "GD" there given the holy ghost overtones. Tebow is terrifying, and the way to beat him is to go all Detroit Lions on them and put them out of their misery early. The problem is that everyone is throwing for 300 yards on us...could Tebow possibly do it today? Can't be definitively sure about that.

The pass rush is where the Broncos are going to try and continue to keep the energy up that this game is sure to bring to Denver (and really it has everywhere else). If any team can destroy an over-aggressive team, it's the Pats. No one has the checkdown options Tom has...actually there is no other offense in which the check downs are the focal point of the offense (outside of the epic down the field Gronkowski lobs...which are sublime). This again is another game in which the balance on offense does not have to be there. It's so cliché, but the short pass is going to be our running game in this one (hoping for a few Law Firm sightings though). No Deion Branch today...what's crazy is that Ochocinco, who has like 20 catches this year, is going to draw Champ Bailey (because no offense, he can't hang with Welker or Gronk...which is okay, few can). So their best player is on arguably our 5th or 6th option (seriously, Woodhead is ahead of Ochocinco on target looks).

Injuries are still killing us. No Chung, Spikes, or Vollmer again today...of course all of those positions are huge today, esp. Vollmer with Von Miller and Elvis Dumervil out there. Spikes and Chung are solid up the middle, but realistically, the battery of Vince Wilfork and Jerod Mayo up the middle is what's going to key our D. Unless I'm way off, their defense is going to be fueled by everything up the middle, which is what we do (again, they don't have Welker and Gronk...that makes a difference), and sprinkle Demaryus Thomas on medium-to-deep sideline routes. Their run game is great, but Vince Wilfork and Jerod Mayo, again, are great.

Tebow time could happen, but the attitude has to be demolition. It has to be "let's beat the shit out of them and not have to hear about this until the next time we play them" kind of attitude. If Tebow has any chance, their fans and the rest of America not associated with us will pull for him to do it again, because it's fun to a.) watch, and b.) pull against the Pats, which they LOVE to do if they can.

...but enough of all that, because that went on way too long...but at least it was only like three sentences about Tebow (okay maybe four now), and really that is all I'm hearing about this game...so hopefully that was semi-refreshing, well probably not to Tebow freaks (five). Okay, here's show you where to place all your fake money...

Pats (-7) vs. Denver: This is not a slam dunk by any means (I actually just erased "Denver +8"), but it can happen where we can throw up 30 points before they know what hit them...I dunno though...how have we done in like really, REALLY high-TV rated games lately? Not so hot (last big win was against the G-Men to go 16-0 in that season that I don't want to talk about). Tebow time will happen...you just want to be up by 40 when it does.

...and yes, there are other games today...I know I was shocked!!! Haha.

G-Men (-6) vs. DC: I just love when they go to Roy Hellllluuuuuuuuuu (Mrs. Doubtfire is actually on right now, how great is that)...but yeah way too much...I dunno...everything from the Giants.

Green Bay (-12) vs. KC: I wanna help you out KC, but what exactly are you showing me? Is Kyle Orton the answer to keep it close against the Packers...ahhhhh nooooooooo.

New Orleans (-7) vs. Minnesota: Again, it's like can Joe Webb keep it close against the Saints? Ahhhhhh noooooooooo. Update: Adrian Peterson will play...still can't pick 'em.

Seattle (+3.5) vs. Chicago: And I'm free...I'm free falling! Sorry to jinx Marshawn Lynch but I'm hoping for more beast mode...who doesn't like beast mode?

Buffalo (Pk) vs. Miami: Here's our 23-17 game this week...all I have to say: Thank God for RedZone.

Carolina (+4.5) vs. Houston: Why can't Andre Johnson catch a break?

Tennessee (-6.5) vs. Indy: Again, no offense Matt Hasselbeck, but I'm kind of pulling for this to be Jake Locker and the Titans -6.5 vs. Indy.

Cincinnati (-7) vs. St. Louis: This spread opened at -3.5 and moved all the way up to -7 with no injuries and really nothing notable to speak of occurring...so Vegas scccrrreeeeewwweeeddd up (I like when they're wrong).

Detroit (-3) vs. Oakland: Started at +1, now at -3...we're bringing down the house this weekend! Ndomakung Suh is back to commit more assault and battery-like plays, and the Raiders can't stop the Lions' O now back at full strength.

Jersey (-3) vs. Philly:
Vick is back, but he is hobbling to the finish. The Jets made a statement against the 'Skins on the road two weeks ago, and they need this win to keep pace with us, especially since a win for us is not a lock.

Arizona (-7) vs. Cleveland: Show me 24-3.

San Diego Super Chargers (+3) vs. Baltimore: We desperately need Baltimore to lose because they currently hold the #1 spot in the AFC, and not only do we need one, but the Chargers need one because Denver is starting to run away with the division, and hopefully they will be in a position to gain a game tonight.

Pittsburgh (-3) vs. 49ers: Holy shit ESPN got a good game. This game better be worth like 1.7 billion dollars man! Hahaha. The Niners have nothing to play for, something I should have taken into account last week when they lost to the Cards...really San Fran...really? The Cardinals? This is why no one has faith in the long-term aspirations of this team (that and the Packers).

Alright, this took entirely too long. Haha, I'm getting so distracted by movies on TV right now. Mrs. Doubtfire, Donnie Brasco, Kindergarten Cop, Beverly Hills Ninja...a loaded Sunday block I must say. It's looking like a halftime of the 1:00 games journey out into the real world today, which I hear is absolutely frigid. Stay warm, drink lots. GO PATS!!!

1:22: Just sat down to a nice bowl of cereal. Now, time for a few updates. The Seahawks just unleashed the beast for a -7 gain and a 5 yard reception inside the 10 on 2nd and 3rd and goal after Johnny Knox got absolutely blown up trying to recover a fumble (he's okay...sort of). 3-0 Hawks. Update: The Bears get called for using their own players for leverage to block a kick, 1st and Goal for Seattle...UNLEASH THE BEAST!!! Marshawn Lynch with a TD in 10 straight games. 7-0 Seattle.

GB is looking wildly human against KC, with a 3-0 lead for the Chiefs and Jordy Nelson about to receive an offensive pass interference penalty.

Lance Moore is in the end zone in Minny. 7-3 Vikings.

Rex just threw his second pick of the game, and yet the Skins are still up 3-0.

1:31: C.J. Spiller with a TD to put the Bills up 7-0 in the blinding snow! Haha, I love it. Is this the first game that's had snow in it? I want to say yes. Anyway, a team from Miami playing in the snow? Yeah I'm liking that pick a lot right now.

1:33: Green Bay getting knocked around at Arrowhead...can't even begin to get into how huge of a story this could potentially be...it is probably the only thing that could take anything away from Pats/Tebow today.

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